PFPS....

....stands for Patello Femoral Pain Syndrome.

That's why my knees hate me. It's not really a specific condition. It's the term they slap onto any knee pain that can't be easily diagnosed. Apparently...it's common. (Duh...knee pain is common. The generic term they apply to it is likely to be common as well). I started a physical therapy program on Monday. I was actually pretty worried about it. My left knee was really starting to crap out on me. I was out on a story (chasing around a little black bear that wandered into Bozeman) and I wanted to curl up and scream. I didn't think I could handle any type of therapy. But my first gym session went rather well. Hopefully, it will get back to normal. I just want to be able to hike again without wincing as I descend a hill.

This whole thing brings up a point that I've touched on before: My body is falling apart.

Let's recap shall we.
-I have the teeth of an 80 year old
-I have a slowly receding hairline
-I've had serious problems with my sinuses
-I get nasty, nasty blisters
-My right ankle is oh-so-very weak.
-My knees are giving me grief

Perhaps these problems didn't start within the past two years, but I had never noticed any of them until I moved to Bozeman. Maybe my love affair with Montana makes for a dangerous relationship. Maybe Montana is slowly killing me. Perhaps my health depends on me getting out of this state. Oh wait....I can't do that until I...find...a...job. That's still not going so well. Which brings me to...

....THIS

That will take you to a copy of my resume tape online. It just went up today. More tapes are being sent tomorrow.

Round 2

Okay. First I write a post showing off all the cities in which I've applied for jobs. Then I write a post explaining how the "how's the job hunt going" question was grating on me. And now, I'm writing a post about the latest round of tapes I've sent out. I'm a glutton for punishment. I've received zero responses from my first batch of tapes. Here's hoping round two goes a little bitter. Without further ado:

Boise, Idaho

Eugene, Oregon

Richmond, Virginia

Portland, Maine

Harrisburg, Pennsylvania

Rochester, New York

Winston-Salem, North Carolina

100% Pure New Zealand

I got on YouTube tonight to see what all the fuss was about with Sally Fields' Emmy acceptance speech. (Ridiculous by the way. I don't even see why it's an issue. Completely overblown). Anyway, I saw the following video featured on YouTube's main page. I'm posting this for no one's benefit other than my own. I spent 6 months in New Zealand a few years ago. I loved it. I'd go back in a heartbeat. I watched this video and got a little teary-eyed. I love New Zealand.

Guinness Goodness

Skeezix....thanks for the inspiration.

I've wrote of my attitude towards cooking and baking on this blog. It's not a question of whether I can cook. It's a question of whether I WANT to cook. I'm certainly no Bobby Flay, but if I want to get my grill on, I think I can hold my own. I usually never want to. That all changed last week when I saw this blog entry from skeezix. A chocolate cake made with Guinness? Intriguing.

I actually hate Guinness. I don't like dark beers. But in a chocolate cake....well, it just seemed fitting. So when the Bozeman newsies decided to have a dinner party this weekend I thought, "hey...let's give that cake a try.

It turned out well. It definitely wasn't as pretty as the one from skeezix. I need more practice making it. (The photo you see....I found that on the internet). But it was tasty. I made two of them...one was more of a trial run than anything else. I found that while I like the idea of a cake that's not too sweet....I need a frosting that's less centered around cream cheese. So for the second cake, I replaced part of the cream cheese with butter. Still a teensy bit too cream cheesy...but almost right.

All in all...a successful baking endeavor.

It was the perfect ending to Rob and Jeff's delectable bacon-encrusted meatloaf, Beth and Aaron's au gratin potatoes, spicy hot wings, and artichoke dip and Dave's salad. Next week is Italian. Anyone have ideas on what I can contribute?

Pandora's Box

"How's the job hunt going?"

I've obviously set myself up for that question. But I've heard it so many times in the last two weeks...that I'm becoming irritated.

I suppose that in the back of my mind I had convinced myself of my own greatness. I would send a few resume tapes out, everyone would call wanting me to work for them, and I'd make them fight over me.

Um.....not exactly. There's nothing like reality to humble a person.

I've had zero responses. In the grand scheme of things I guess that's normal. Ten tapes isn't a lot. But I had such high hopes. And now I'm left with the task of sheepishly responding to that annoying question. "Not so well."

Rest assured that if I do have a job prospect, I will let the world know. I know people have good intentions but please....spare me the task of looking you in the eye and explaining how, at the moment, no one wants me.

It's depressing.

Cleveland Rocks!

Climb the highest mountain in Glacier National Park. Check.

My vacation got off to a great start last weekend when I climbed Mt. Cleveland with Glacier buddies Ron and Andrew. Cleveland had been in my sights for years but in a park as big as Glacicer...there was always something else to do first. I had sort of resigned myself to not climbing it, but alas....we did it. Although awesome, it was by far the most grueling trek I've done in Glacier...simply because of how my body seemed to turn on me. I think I did some serious damage to myself on that damn Bridger Ridge Run back in August. I've never had problems with my knees until the run. I assumed it was temporary....that they just needed time to recover. It wasn't long before they were feeling fine. But just 6 miles into last weekend's hike, I felt the pain return. It stayed with me (in fact it got steadily worse) the 3 days and 2 nights we were in the backcountry. (My boots betrayed me as well...giving me 12 painful blisters). The last 5 miles on the last day were sheer hell...and that was WITH lots of ibuprofen. I'm not sure what's up. I'm going to the knee doctor this afternoon. I'm hoping my knees are just stressed out and not permanently damaged.

I digress.

I did have a lot of fun. Even with the pain and misery associated with backcountry hiking and camping, the rewards are great. I love the outdoors.

Ron and Andy traversing a goat trail beneath the Stoney Indian Peaks. Yes, there is a trail there. The precipitous drop looks worse than it really is.

Goofing off in the Belly River Valley

The rest of my vacation was just as great. I went home to Salt Lake for a few days. Unlike previous visits, I wasn't rushed. I didn't try to cram everyone and everything into two short days. I was relaxed. I was rested. I spent adequate amounts of time with everyone I care about. I had lunch with sarahbellum. (Pleasure to meet you Ms. Bellum. You were just as I imagined you...that's a good thing).

I even had time to get addicted to a new television show. What is it with the original series on Showtime, HBO and FX? Why are they always so good? I was lounging around at mom & dad's house, flipping throuhg the On Demand section on TV when I came across Dexter. Michael C. Hall (from Six Feet Under) plays a serial killer...who preys on society's evil-doers (murderers, other serial killers, etc.) Awesome show. I watched the entire first season. I'd recommend it to anyone.

Vacay was good. I'm rejuvenated for work. I'm ready to really dive into the job search. I'm glad I took that breather.

A breather

I'll be taking a breather for the next 11 days.

I'm going on vacation. I'm headed to Glacier for a backpacking trip...then I'm headed home to Salt Lake to spend some time with friends and family.

I'm having lunch with sarahbellum (if she's still up for it) at some point. Any other Salt Lake blog acquaintances interested?

In other news....

...All videos of me on the news (including my blue angels flight) have been removed from YouTube, and thus this blog. One was discovered by a higher-up in the company. I did not get in trouble. But I was asked to remove it because it was copyrighted material. I figured that would happen at some point.

I worked at our parent station in Missoula for the past two days. It was part of an employee swap. I traded places with one of their reporters. It was a good time. Their studio is sooooo NICE. But I like my gig in Bozeman...even if I'm not here for much longer.

I'm tired. I'm stressed. The job hunt still petrifies me. I need a break. I'm looking forward to this vacation. I don't think I'll be blogging while I'm gone. We'll see.

Later.

200

This is my 200th post. On one hand that seems like a lot. On another...it seems like a little, especially since I've had a blog for about 2 years. Hmm. Whatever.

My colleagues and I have been demoted. When I first came to Bozeman I was working in television market 193. (There are 210 markets across the country. They're ranked on how many viewers are in each market. For example, New York is number one. Chicago is three. Salt Lake City is 35. Butte & Bozeman are near the bottom of the list). I didn't care about that. I wanted to live in Montana. Plus, we have an excellent product for a small market TV station...much better than some stations in the country twice our size. A year later, we moved up to market 192. Woohoo!!! Movin' on up. Alas, this year....we've sunk to 194. I'm not sure why. Ask the Nielsen ratings people. Regardless, it's sort of depressing.

It's been one week since I sent out my first tapes. No responses. sigh.

I saw the movie Pan's Labyrinth over the weekend. Wow. Excellent film. It's one of those foreign films where you completely forget you're reading subtitles. The imagery is amazing. Although I can't get these two freaky characters out of my mind.

A Visual Employment Guide

As promised, I've started the job hunt. I'm feeling less ambivalent about leaving Montana. It will always be here. I can always come back. For now, I'm getting excited about the possibilities out there. I've sent out 10 resume tapes. They were quickly put together for the jobs I wanted to get a jump start on. Some of them are long shots....I'll freely admit that. But I saw the job listings and there was just "something" that spoke to me about each one. So I sent some tapes. I do have one definite favorite out of the whole bunch. I'll keep that secret for now. Here are the first cities I've officially applied to. (in no particular order)

Asheville, North Carolina

St. Louis, Missouri

Colorado Springs, Colorado

Orlando, Florida

Denver, Colorado

Manchester, New Hampshire

Portland, Oregon

Honolulu, Hawaii

Albuquerque, New Mexico

Madison, Wisconsin

Alas, there are no jobs available in Salt Lake City. I was about to apply for a reporter job at KSL but the position was filled by the time I got around to it. Maybe something will open up in the next couple weeks or months.

At a crossroads

I knew this was coming. Still, I feel woefully unprepared for it. For the past few days my mind has been filled with a stressful mix of reflection, hope, self-doubt, confidence, and uncertainty. I'm trying as hard as I can to make sense of it all....but my efforts are futile.

Tomorrow, I will officially start the "job hunt." My best effort at a resume tape (sure be revised several times in the near future) is complete. Applications will be moving through the postal system by mid-week. That said...I'm still as confused as ever. I'm trying to take three seemingly contradictory themes...and put them into some sort of order. It isn't easy. It's nearly impossible.

First...I love Montana. I don't know what it is about this state, but I'm hooked. I love the mountains. I love the people. I love the towns. I love the nooks & crannies. I love it all. I suppose I could be a Montanan for the rest of my life and be perfectly content. "So just stay there," you say. Ahh...if only it were that easy.

Second...While I love Montana, there isn't much keeping me here. I realize I'm terribly close to contradicting myself. I don't know how else to describe it. I've found wonderful things in this state but I've yet to find something BIG or SIGNIFICANT to keep me here. I have good friends. But that's not the same as a tight, close circle of friends. I have no significant other. I'm not looking for pity but in a sense...I'm a little lonely here. In other words...I need CHANGE. I'm not sure what kind. I just need some sort of change. I need to shake things up. I'm stagnant. Maybe a minor change, maybe a giant change. I just need some variation of it.

Third...I want to grow professionally. Small market television is....well...amusing to say the least. There's only so far you can take your abilities. I want to see what I'm made of. "So move on," you say. Ahh...if only it were that easy. This is where I go back to loving Montana. I don't know about city life. I'm extremely skeptical. I'm also skeptical of anywhere without mountains. I don't know if I can handle that.

So yeah...that's where I am right now. Perhaps no one will want me...and I'll be forced to stay in Montana to simply keep a job. Then again...that would also probably depress me.

Musings

"Technical difficulties".....the epitome of how a news anchor's lingo has become cliche. "We're having technical difficulties." Yeah, I said that tonight. Luckily (and surprisingly) it wasn't our station. It was "mom & dad" in Missoula. Our parent station couldn't put on a show tonight due to "technical difficulties" so we had to do it for them. Normally our viewing area is southwest Montana. Tonight we branched out into western and northwest Montana as well. I wonder if anyone there saw me, thought "who the hell is that?"....and then turned me off.

Beyond the fire line....I've seen many major wildfires up close. Intense heat, 200 foot flames, black skies, scared bystanders. It's really an awesome sight. What I've never done, until today, was visit the aftermath of a fire...just days after it burned through. I was escorted through parts of the Wicked Creek Fire to get video and interviews with homeowners. It was very cool. We were in an active fire perimeter so there were spot fires here and there that surprised us. Firefighters are amazing people. They have a tough job.

Choking Haze....speaking of wildfires, the entire state of Montana is burning. It's awful. Apparently Idaho is even worse off than we are. The combination of our fires and their fires is making for some MISERABLE air quality across the state. Montana is supposed to have clean, fresh air. Instead, we can't even see the mountains. Visibility today was a measly ONE MILE. My eyes hurt. My throat hurts. My sinuses hurt. We need some wind and rain...badly.

Still recovering....my recovery from the Bridger Ridge Run is taking longer than I anticipated. I have one nasty blister on my right foot that's causing me intense pain. I can't wear closed-toe shoes. I had to interview Montana Sen. Max Baucus and former Utah Governor Mike Leavitt the other day. Did I dress to impress? No. I wore my Chacos because my feet hurt so bad. Did they judge me? I don't know....frankly, I don't care. Also, my right knee is still pissed at me. I wake up in the morning and it's fine. But as soon as I start going down stairs or walking downhill it starts to ache. What do I do for that?

T-Minus 3 Months....I have less than 3 months to go on my contract. I'm excited, nervous, and ambivalent all at the same time. I love Bozeman. I love Montana. I love my job. I don't necessarily want to leave. At the same time, I'm fed up with "office politics," my meager salary, and the bullcrap of working in an atmosphere where the bells & whistles we should be able to afford...are sacrificed for profit. I'm working on my resume tape. It's stressful. I finally feel "settled down" in Bozeman. Pretty soon, I will uproot myself and move somewhere new. That's the recurring theme for the next three months or so.

Buenos Dias.

Crippled by Mountains

For nearly a year the Bridger Mountains have beckoned me. I usually leave the blinds in my bedroom open...giving myself a clear view of the Bridgers everytime I go to, or rise from, bed. Here's that view in winter.

For most of that year, I could look out my window, see the Bridgers, and smile longingly. This morning, I look out and think, "you suck."

I'm only kidding....sort of. I did the Bridger Ridge Run yesterday (read this post from a year ago for background) and this morning...I am unbelievably sore. My entire body hurts, but nothing is giving me more problems than my knees. It's as if they have a mind of their own, and for the time being, have decided it's not in their best interest to bend. When I force them to, they howl in protest. (It's hard to hear them because I'm howling in misery at the same time). Even if they could bend more easily, the 7 or so blisters on my feet are also hindering my ability to walk.

Despite the pain, the run was an oh-so-amazing experience. It was hard. I won't deny it. Harder than I had thought it would be. I've always said I'm not a runner. I am, however, a strong hiker. I figured my hiking skills would get me through. They did....but they also cost me time. I finished in 6 hours 36 minutes. I wasn't last...but I was certainly nowhere near the front of the pack. Out of about 250 runners, I finished about 200th.

I said yesterday that I wouldn't do it again. Even with my wobbly legs today...I'm not sure that's true. While I probably won't be living in Bozeman a year from now...I wouldn't mind coming back to take another shot at the run. I would like to finish under 6 hours.

A special thanks to mom and dad for driving up from Salt Lake just to see me cross the finish line. Thanks guys. I love you.

Trashiness - Part Deux

Sigh.

For the second time in 4 days, the cops showed up at my apartment complex. My downstairs neighbors got into a fight. I was ready to call the police as I saw three guys beating the crap out of another guy. Other neighbors beat me to it. I have a police scanner in my room for work and soon after the fight started, the first calls came in. What is it with some people?

Not in front of the neighbors

As I've mentioned before, I live in low income housing. I've tried to fight the stereotype that "trashy" people live in such shelter because....hey, I live here...and I'm not trashy. On top of that, I have a pretty nice apartment. Low income housing in Bozeman is far different than low income housing in Detroit. Still, the trashiness abounds. What's worse is that it always seems to happen when I have guests staying with me.

My friend Maureen (and her friend Katie) stopped in Bozeman for a couple days on their weeks-long road trip. We had all gone to bed Saturday night when we hear yelling in the parking lot. I get up, look out the window, and see my neighbors going at it in the parking lot. There's the man, holding a baby with one arm, fighting with his girlfriend. I didn't think about calling the police until he grabbed her shirt and ripped it off her with a force that scared me a little. Katie told me to call the police at that point...and I did. To make a long story short, the guy was carted off to jail for the weekend. I have no idea if he's out or not. The cops knocked on my door at 2 am to take our statements. What a bizarre night. I'm glad it's over.

In other news...

...my Blue Angels story continues draw attention. The reaction and feedback I've received has been astounding. I've come to the conclusion that people really do watch the local news....they just don't talk about it unless they see something completely out of the ordinary. I've had more people approach me in the past week, than I've had in the past year. The best was when a guy came up to me in the bar and said, "I've never watched the local news in my life. The one night I do...I see you passing out in an F-18. That was awesome."

It was awesome...and I'm still as grateful as ever.

I'm leaving on a jet plane....

I have to admit that until recently, I was completely unaware of the significance of the "Blue Angels." Sure, I'd heard of them. But I had no idea they had such a following. In the days before and after my Blue Angels flight, I've had several people come up and say, "wow, I am so jealous of you. You're doing something I've always dreamed of doing." I'm not really sure how to respond. There's a twinge of guilt in knowing that I flew with the Blue Angels...even though I'm not "part of the club" so to speak.

All I can say is that I'm a lucky guy...and I know that.

Without further adieu, here's the story I put together on my flight. I'd say it's probably my favorite story I've done while working in Bozeman. Have a look. It's pretty funny. I pass out several times.



Maybe I can ride with the Thunderbirds if they ever come to town.

Another one bites the dust

A year and 8 months at my station and I just sat through my 3rd farewell. Andrew Capasso had his last show tonight. He's moving on to a station in western Pennsylvania. I've scratched my head over many of Andrew's quirks, behavior, and work habits. At the end of the day though, Andrew is as genuine a person as I know. You can wonder where his head's at but you never have to wonder whether Andrew is really being Andrew. There are plenty of fake people out there. Andrew isn't one of them. I admire him for that. Andrew, we will definitely miss you. Good luck in all and go take Fox News by storm.

In other news...

....I took my Blue Angels flight today. Um............wow. I'm not even going to begin to describe it right now. My story will air Thursday night. I'll post it later that night. Let me just say it was the ride of a lifetime...and I'm a little embarassed. (NO, I did not throw up). I'll explain it all in my next post. For now, here's me before I left on the flight.

Have a good one.

Harry & G-Forces

I've finished the last Harry Potter book. Wow. Very, very good. I want to talk about it but I know there are people who read this blog that haven't finished the book. Therefore, I won't spoil it for them.

I will say two things. First, I expected a little more sadness. I think the fact that "major characters die" was built up to the point that people expected a bloodbath. And while there was some serious carnage, I thought there may be more. Second, I have loved these books. I know millions of people out there feel the same but I sometimes have to defend myself against those who don't "get" Harry Potter. I'm 27 years old and I love nothing more than descending into Harry's world and getting lost in it. It's amazing. It really is. I have so much respect and admiration for J.K. Rowling. I don't know how someone is so imaginative that they create such a richly detailed world. I make no apologies for being a Harry Potter dork. I'm sorry the series is over but...it was one hell of a ride. At least we have two more movies to look forward to.

Guess what else I have to look forward to? Tomorrow at 4 o'clock, I will by flying high above the skies of Bozeman in an F-18 fighter jet.

Yes ladies and gentlemen, I have been chosen to fly with the Blue Angels. I was an alternate candidate in the beginning and I didn't think my chances were very good. But someone else was eliminated because of medical conditions and I got the call. I'm excited beyond belief. I'm hoping I don't vomit.

Wish me luck. I'll be sure to let you know how it goes.

Blackhawk Cruisin'

Yesterday was another one of those days where I love my job.

I got to ride in a blackhawk helicopter. We were doing a story on a group called ESGR...or "Employer Support of the Guard and Reserve." It's an organization that helps national guard members and the employers they work for resolve differences that arise when a guard member gets deployed. Nearly 100 employers from around the Gallatin Valley were invited to attend. The helicopter rides were part of a big promotion for the whole thing.

Here's a brief video clip of the ride:



We went on a 20 minute flight over the Gallatin Valley...chopper doors wide open. It...was...awesome!

Now if only I can get that Blue Angels flight I wrote about a few weeks ago.

Desolation

Remember the creepy poplar tree farm I saw on my trip to Oregon? After driving home from Glacier on Sunday I've decided to make a tradition out of finding creepy looking places on my road trips.

It was early Sunday...I was only 20 minutes into my drive when I came upon this:

It looks like an abandoned school on the Blackfeet Indian Reservation. I can't put my finger on it but...I didn't like the looks of this place. Perfectly still, rusting playground equipment on dead, bone-dry grass. The group of horses huddled up next to the boarded up schoolhouse windows and doors didn't help improve the ambience.

Just a general creepy place. Agree?

Wilbur Ascended

This past Saturday, I climbed this:

It's Mt. Wilbur in Glacier National Park. The Blackfeet Indians know it as Heavy Shield. The picture doesn't do it justice. While not "super-tall" (9,321 feet) it nonetheless towers over the Many Glacier Valley. Whilst living there for 4 summers, I looked up at Wilbur dozens of times every single day...always wanting to stand on the summit. But because of its reputation for being somewhat of a sketchy climb, I always forewent Wilbur for easier peak bagging in the park.

No more.

The opportunity to climb the bad boy presented itself this weekend (with Glacier buddy Ron)...and I took it. I'm not gonna lie. I was a little anxious. Some people told me it was awful. Others said it was a piece of cake. Regardless, I did it. It wasn't awful...but it wasn't a cake-walk either. There were at least 4 times when I was legitimately nervous about climbing a particular section. This was one of them:

We didn't use ropes...and frankly we didn't need to. But there was plenty of equipment already stashed on the mountain for those who brought ropes or webbing. As we got closer to the summit the thought of coming down kept weighing on my mind. Most of those thoughts disappeared temporarily after getting to the summit and seeing these views:

Looking down on Iceberg Lake; Glacier mountains in the distance

The Many Glacier Valley (Look closely...you can see the hotel)

Ron & I on the summit

The trip back down was scary at times...but not as bad as I thought it would be. The worst part came near the end when we were almost back to the trail. Ron looked down the slope and saw two giant grizzlies foraging in the brush. We were a good distance away (a couple hundred yards maybe) and they didn't notice us. Unfortunately they were right where we needed to go. Eventually we started yelling in hopes of scaring them off. Didn't work. One of them just became curious and started to mosey on up the hill towards us. We took off at a brisk pace in another direction and ended up bushwhacking through alders, thimbleberry bushes, and aspen before finally reaching the trail...tired and sweating profusely.

All in all, it was a very good day. We ended it at the Park Cafe with a plate of nachos, a gypsy burrito, and a piece of strawberry-rhubarb pie.

We also saw this guy on the climb:

I zoomed as far as I could go so I lost some picture quality. But I still think it's an awesome shot.

I love Glacier.